So things are progressing slower than I might have liked out of the gate but it’s probably to be expected. Current plans for post-IST projects are still in the planning stages and we’ll see how things progress. But in general school news, I’m not teaching the Advanced Math portion of the PCM (Physics Chemistry Math) combination. While a little bummed, I think this is a very good thing. I have a bad habit of biting off way more than I can chew to balance out my laziness at times and I think diving into 4 different syllabuses in 5 different classes would have been a bit much. So now, I instead have 3 syllabuses in 4 classes which looks to be plenty large a load, especially if I’m successful in getting outside projects off the ground. Which projects will be successful? We will see. I’m currently putting my focus on getting off to a strong start with teaching in the classroom and improving the library as a resource. I think that after these two, projects involving a garden and perhaps HIV and AIDS education could be in the works. I’m learning that I am not going to be told what to do beyond teach these classes and if any of these projects are going to happen, I need to be assertive. And since assertiveness is something I’ve always lacked, this will be a good exercise!
Not much other news on the home front. My kittens are starting to look outside of their sleeping space. They level of cuteness is nearing its maximum as they begin to act like cats but still have that baby waddle and fall on occasion. While it’s all very fun to watch, I’m constantly nervous about when they start looking for more food beyond mom’s milk. I could see that being a very expensive situation once they start to grow and have to eat to maintain that growth. Hopefully I’ll have found suitable families for homes by then.
In other news, I just finished reading a book called The New Great Game about oil and its impacts on the Central Asian region. While intended to be first a snapshot of the situation in the area and how oil access dictates it, it certainly paints a dark picture about American intentions in the region. I suppose everyone has their own opinion about why the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq are ongoing but I’m feeling less optimistic about our motivations entering them. Regardless, that’s not really my point. The fact is that almost every major player in the region is inevitably tied to oil as it seems to be the only source of money. Often, that money finds its way into the pockets of the country’s elite and not to the public coffers, empowering a ruling class that frequently does not have the well being of their constituents in mind. Those facts made our deals with the governments, allowing bases or other concessions for the war in Afghanistan, worse as we legitimized very undemocratic and oppressive governments. But in addition to that, the book highlighted just how much of our foreign policy, much of it big brotherish in nature, was focused on ensuring a supply of cheap oil. It also highlighted how foreign public opinion of Bush Administration America was decidedly negative as a result. This all got me to thinking about my responsibilities as an ambassador of the US. As much as I’d like to not think so, I am the most powerful image of the US to my students and fellow teachers. The media can say what it wants, and if that’s the primary source of information they’ll probably believe it. But if I contradict the message, my one-on-one relationship is going to have significantly more power. The perception is often that Americans are arrogant and self-centered and sadly, that can easily be proven. Making an effort to balance between giving help and humility can be a challenge at times, especially when you feel like you know the right answer. Americans used to be perceived as the forefathers of democracy and freedom, the shining light in darkness, etc. but now, many see that freedom as something deteriorated to a greedy monster which will only help you if it’s in its best interests. Regardless of our motivations for our actions, I feel like our ability to do good in the world is entirely dependent on the belief that we stand for a free way of life. Without others looking up to us, we can’t carry out our foreign policy, good or bad. Therefore, I see the value of organizations like Peace Corps beyond simply educating some 150 students. But the nation also has to consider sacrificing some amenities like $1.50 a gallon gas in order to maintain the respect and positive feeling from the rest of the world.
I’m getting tired so I can’t say too much more, but I do want to mention something to all my Sedgwick County Readers. I saw on the Wichita Business Journal website the other day that the Intrust Bank Arena ranked in the 45th in the world for ticket sales in the quarter. Now I know it helps that it’s a new venue etc. but let’s remember that it’s generally considered about 5000 seats too small for a major arena. I acknowledge that I haven’t been in town, but from what I see in the news, parking has not been the ridiculous disaster it was supposed to be. And if I remember right, the project was on budget with the tax ending when it said it would, and the opening was only slightly behind the original schedule. So, done right and well is the moral of the story. Perhaps I’m missing things, I’m sure someone would have a list for me if I asked, but that seems like success story based on increasing taxes slightly for a very specific purpose. So instead of using the name of an event that occurred because of a lack of representation not a lack of your own ideas having the majority of representation, let’s sit at a table, talk through things and get stuff done. I’m tired of American politics, or what the media wants to show me. I really hope this is a byproduct of the recession and everyone is just being more vocal about fixing the problem and people can actually have an open debate with reason, understanding, and compromise once things improve. I really really hope.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Sunday, March 28, 2010
First reactions to IST
Sorry for the long absence, I’ve had a lot to do. And yet, nothing to do at the same time. But that’s a discussion for a bit later. To make a short wrap up of the last month and a half, I finished school (a week early), bummed around for two weeks, then went to Iringa for a training. Now, today, I just finished an 8 hour trip involving 3 coasters (a vehicle that is about halfway between the size of a small bus and a 15 passenger van) and lots of naps and I’m sitting in my house with 6 kittens squealing from the other room. So, much is new.
I’ve found Peace Corps to be an amazingly varied experience. With the right people in the right room saying the right things, changing the world is easy. But when it comes to traveling alone squished 5-to-a-row on 4 seat rows for 8 hours, that SUV and sub sandwich sounds awfully nice. It was surprising how much seeing my fellow group mates impacted me but once I realized that, it was not surprising how much it I didn’t enjoy seeing them go. Yes, I have an awesome region with awesome volunteers I can see frequently, but if some is good, more is better, right? I feel motivated to travel, which is a nice thing seeing as before I left I found myself in a contented indifference to much else in Tanzania beyond my immediate surroundings.
I hate big posts because I never know what to say and what to let go. I think I’m going to try to work through my thoughts on the training sessions in individual posts here so I can kind of use this as an opportunity to organize my thoughts. So, look forward to such scintillating topics as corporal punishment, HIV and AIDS, gardening, and more! :P
Anyway, my musings for today mostly have to do with my motivation, which is somewhat linked to what I said before I left. I’m feeling motivated to study Swahili again! I expected that because despite my lethargic tendencies I am aware of how little I know. Now we just have to make it happen. I also am looking forward to starting a secondary project. I haven’t matched my thoughts up with my school’s desires but we shall see what happens. I’m thinking permagardening would be a good project given our space issues on campus. But I also can see the need for an improved library. We shall see what all is involved but I just really want to identify a project that everyone is excited about so it keeps going after I’m gone. I want to have a sit down with my headmaster so when that happens I’ll update you on the future.
Outside of sessions talking about a wide range of things, I had a fantastic time with the people. I reconnected with the guy I shadowed during training and met several new people. Each night was usually an opportunity to chat with nearly everyone and fill in the last three months. I found that my connections and opinions of many people had changed. Maybe not dramatically, but I feel like I can relate to everyone more now, for obvious reasons, and that in turn made me understand many more of their……unique tendencies. But, it was awesome to have one of those situations where you realize, the people here are exactly who you need right now. They’re the right balance of activities you always enjoy no matter how horrible you are (basketball) and getting you to enjoy something you never enjoy because they’re just the right group to make it work (dancing). I recognize that it’s hard to stay in touch with everyone you’d like to but I think it’s important to do it with those who you can. I’ve been incredibly lucky to have devoted friends over the years, and where I’ve failed, often they have succeeded. I’m still nursing a pen pal relationship from age 7/8 and a few days together so somewhere something is going right.
So, with that I’ll end on a positive note. I’m so tired, but I’m finishing the day with motivation to continue. Continue work, continue relationships, and continue this lifestyle (although returning to the squatter after 2 weeks with a lovely western toilet may be the most difficult of all).
I’ve found Peace Corps to be an amazingly varied experience. With the right people in the right room saying the right things, changing the world is easy. But when it comes to traveling alone squished 5-to-a-row on 4 seat rows for 8 hours, that SUV and sub sandwich sounds awfully nice. It was surprising how much seeing my fellow group mates impacted me but once I realized that, it was not surprising how much it I didn’t enjoy seeing them go. Yes, I have an awesome region with awesome volunteers I can see frequently, but if some is good, more is better, right? I feel motivated to travel, which is a nice thing seeing as before I left I found myself in a contented indifference to much else in Tanzania beyond my immediate surroundings.
I hate big posts because I never know what to say and what to let go. I think I’m going to try to work through my thoughts on the training sessions in individual posts here so I can kind of use this as an opportunity to organize my thoughts. So, look forward to such scintillating topics as corporal punishment, HIV and AIDS, gardening, and more! :P
Anyway, my musings for today mostly have to do with my motivation, which is somewhat linked to what I said before I left. I’m feeling motivated to study Swahili again! I expected that because despite my lethargic tendencies I am aware of how little I know. Now we just have to make it happen. I also am looking forward to starting a secondary project. I haven’t matched my thoughts up with my school’s desires but we shall see what happens. I’m thinking permagardening would be a good project given our space issues on campus. But I also can see the need for an improved library. We shall see what all is involved but I just really want to identify a project that everyone is excited about so it keeps going after I’m gone. I want to have a sit down with my headmaster so when that happens I’ll update you on the future.
Outside of sessions talking about a wide range of things, I had a fantastic time with the people. I reconnected with the guy I shadowed during training and met several new people. Each night was usually an opportunity to chat with nearly everyone and fill in the last three months. I found that my connections and opinions of many people had changed. Maybe not dramatically, but I feel like I can relate to everyone more now, for obvious reasons, and that in turn made me understand many more of their……unique tendencies. But, it was awesome to have one of those situations where you realize, the people here are exactly who you need right now. They’re the right balance of activities you always enjoy no matter how horrible you are (basketball) and getting you to enjoy something you never enjoy because they’re just the right group to make it work (dancing). I recognize that it’s hard to stay in touch with everyone you’d like to but I think it’s important to do it with those who you can. I’ve been incredibly lucky to have devoted friends over the years, and where I’ve failed, often they have succeeded. I’m still nursing a pen pal relationship from age 7/8 and a few days together so somewhere something is going right.
So, with that I’ll end on a positive note. I’m so tired, but I’m finishing the day with motivation to continue. Continue work, continue relationships, and continue this lifestyle (although returning to the squatter after 2 weeks with a lovely western toilet may be the most difficult of all).
Thoughts on passion
It seems to me that life can be described in many ways, but one way that has been highlighted recently is categorizing life into two forms, those with and without passion. It takes a special kind of person to leave the comforts of home and do work with foreign people in a foreign land. Now, before it starts sounding too much like I’m patting myself on the back let me say that I’m not sure I’m the best kind of person for this kind of work, I may not even be a good kind. I could see, within 24 hours, the passion that my group of volunteers had for the task they were committing themselves to. It may not have been as evident for each character in the story of Peace Corps Tanzania Education class 2009, but there was a genuine willingness to do meaningful work. The problem is simple; passion fades. If excitement were constant, it wouldn’t be important. So the question is what goes beyond passion, beyond excitement. Passion is an intensely powerful force. It makes the irrational rational, the general unique, and the stupid quite reasonable. It can be found for ultimately anything, a sport, a work of art, a career, a god, and hopefully for each of us, a person. It can also be incredibly unhealthy, as passion for a multitude of things destroys multitudes of lives every day. However, what I have been struggling with as of late is an unfulfilled passion for passion. It is incredibly easy to do something when your entire body delights in its required action. However, the self-control required to push yourself through those times when you feel passion-less is a challenge I have yet to master. Compounding this problem is successful procrastination. Nothing reinforces laziness as effectively as successfully avoiding work without consequence. So, back to PC TZ ED 09. It’s easy to be excited and passionate on the bus ride to the airport before leaving, but day 179 in country is a better measure for the passions of your group. Are the motivations still the passion for the world? Or now perhaps your passion is for a job that pays you a living wage, even if it is in a third world country. Do two people with those very different fuels for their fires have any difference in the outcome? If both motivations are equally as strong, passion, in theory, will produce the same product. Ignoring the capitalist argument about the second person needing to be rewarded with more money for more work, it would seem that those benefiting from each volunteer get the same thing out of the deal. So then, does it matter why we’re here, assuming, of course, that each gives their best effort? Does it matter what passion is driving our work, as long as we’re getting the work done? Honestly, I know it’s more complicated than the presence or absence of relevant passion but when you’re facing the paper piles that must be graded, or read, or cleaned, passion for doing what you must is an incredible boost.
UPDATE: The advantages of not posting right away are I get to kind of read between the lines of what I wrote later. Basically this was my way of venting on how I can't motivate myself very often, but hoping that the ensuing IST would. For more on that, read above!
UPDATE: The advantages of not posting right away are I get to kind of read between the lines of what I wrote later. Basically this was my way of venting on how I can't motivate myself very often, but hoping that the ensuing IST would. For more on that, read above!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Didn't have anything good to write about so I wrote about everything....
So my internet expansion during my last semester at Cornell and the following summer before Peace Corps led me to redefine my information gathering experience into more of a blog-oriented experience. Here in TZ, that has actually become quite an advantage as the blogging websites frequently ignore the flashy in-your-face media of the internet information powerhouses and go more for content. One can argue about the value of this content but no one can deny its massive existence. And I think nothing embodies that more than the link dump. While I will link you to absolutely no where with this post, it offers me the opportunity to say quick ideas about things in my life that seem otherwise insignificant and not worthy of posting. Because let’s be honest, life is not made up of extravagant events after fantastic adventures, it’s made up of the good days and the bad, which can be classified one way or another by the smallest of events.
So here it goes….
Thoughts from around the house:
- Cooking was said to be a challenge, and I’ve found that to be both true and not. On the one hand, much of the Tanzanian food choices do take quite a bit of time and effort but planning can allow you very easy meals from time to time. I completely understand the choice to have someone do the cooking for you if you can afford it though. I’ve made it easier on myself by splurging on a few “extras” but if you ignore the start up time for a stick fire, cooking is similar in nature (speed-wise). But I do have a newfound appreciation for family cooks in the US. There is really no way to make a good balanced meal in anything shorter than 30 minutes.
- Fresh fruit is wildly underrated. Granted, it helps that I live in a place where the mango I buy probably fell off a tree down the street a few hours earlier (which means it needs to sit for 3-4 days to ripen but that’s beside my point). Regardless, a pineapple for breakfast (or lunch or dinner) is quite a pleasant experience :D
- Sugar goes on everything. My dinner tonight was kind of a potato stew in which I threw into the mashed potatoes every veggie that was on its way out in my cabinet. So I fried them in some sunflower oil and threw some sugar on. This is my latest experiment, and a success too! Mmmmm caramelized vegetables!
- Preparation is really necessary in food/drink. I can’t count how many nights I’ve wanted something more dynamic but thought about dinner too late, resulting in some variation of spaghetti with variations on top. Also, I have to boil my water, which obviously has to cool before I can drink it. I also run it through a filter, which takes quite a while. So I’ve come to the conclusion I need to start the water almost 24 hours before I want to drink it. That’s a lot of foresight for quenching thirst!
- For those of you who haven’t heard, I now possess (I didn’t pay anything for her so I guess I can’t own) a cat. She is named Chichi, which comes from the Swahili word parachichi which means avocado. That was the first thing I learned she liked to eat, which greatly eased her transition to my house. She’s quite the affectionate creature. Even now she’s curled up on my lap in between me and my computer. At night she finds her way under my mosquito net to sleep on my bed with me. She’s quite pleasant to have around and I’m enjoying her company!
- I never really thought about the value of lighting the space around your house until I came here. My back porch light didn’t work when I arrived and I actually avoided leaving the house, even just to the back stoop or water pipe after dark. Now I’ve had a new light installed, apparently an adapter inside had broken, and my back porch is well lit. It vastly improves my comfort and I’m quite grateful for it!
Thoughts from school:
- I do not understand how teachers can assign homework as frequently as they do in high school. I grade for one class and two subjects and I look at my paper pile in disgust. How did they do it for six periods every day or two?!?
- Homework is a different animal here. Many kids just don’t think they need to do it and so they won’t, not understanding its uses as a guide to the teacher. I can understand not knowing how to do something and not wanting to show that, but isn’t it still better to prove you know something, even if it’s just that you don’t know the material? That’s really valuable information, knowing you don’t understand something. I just don’t get it. But then again, I didn’t get it in the US when kids did that either.
- Tanzanians are obsessed with their exams. One thing I loved about the IB program was its focus on well rounded LEARNING. The tests matter, yes. Are they worth everything? You could make an argument they are because of how much bearing they have on the next level’s activities but IB, fortunately, never saw it that way. There’s more to being smart than knowing facts. People here still aren’t quite over the idea that if you can solve a difficult equation that means you know the material. There’s more too it than that!
Thoughts from the Region:
- If you’ll remember, my first post from TZ was finished by mentioning the earthquake that occurred during the construction of that post. I believe it ended up being around a 5.8 and was followed within 36 hours by a 6.0 nearby (<100 miles). I learned today, through the undeniable source Wikipedia :P, that there were apparently nearly 30 earthquakes detected relating to that quake leading a few people to wonder if volcanic activity could be playing a role. The nearest volcano to that series of quakes is none other than my district’s namesake Mount Rungwe. I’m not particularly nervous but having my own Dante’s Peak experience seems like it could be more excitement than I was planning on when entering the Peace Corps. I can feel the earth shake when I’m lying in bed sometimes but I have been able to tell that a fair majority of these are the large semi-trucks down the way on the main highway. We’ll keep you apprised of the situation, although I’m sure my adventurous is just taking any opportunity to extrapolate the most fantastic event possible.
Thoughts from the World:
The other benefit of my current situation is the ease with which I am connected to the world. I see the big events through the scope of The Wichita Eagle, which also keeps me informed about all the happenings in the ICT. Beyond that my blogs fill me in, so I’ll comment on what I’ve been up to date on.
- The $8 billion in high-speed rail funds were distributed with the biggest shares going to California, Florida, and Illinois. I’m a huge fan of both the California and Chicago-Hub proposals and I think they deserved the money they received without question. Florida’s proposal is more of a thrill ride to get to Disney and to make Orlando a secondary Tampa area airport. But it’s a start. Kansas even got 300K to do a study on restarting rail service through Wichita! At first I would have said give a large portion to a project that we can build as an example of how good high-speed rail can be in the US, but after looking at the numbers of how the money was distributed, I can only applaud the Obama administration. They really focused on not being the only government moeny being spent on a potential project. That's why even Kansas got help. It was a reward for doing your own work. A pact almost, saying if you do your end, we'll pick up ours, which is the way it should be. Now if only we could get closer to the federal/local funding split we see with highways....... :P While giving the largest sums of money to those who have the biggest and most promising projects, they also found ways to help the middle sized markets. For example, Wisconsin has poured quite a bit of it’s own money into developing a rail connection from Madison to Milwaukee and improving service onward to Chicago. The federal government used the funds to assist that project and really push it towards completion. Now Wisconsin is going to have 110mph service between its two most prominent cities in less than 5 years. That’s nearing Acela type service, which hits speeds over 130 but can hardly maintain them in the Northeast Corridor. Now, I’m in the camp that we should go all the way with HSR and build our systems for 220mph operation, but if we can go from no trains to several trains a day at 110mph in some locations with reasonable investments, I think that is fantastic! Let’s hope the jobs bill has more infrastructure money for investments like these!
- The Kansas City Royals are not projected to be a particularly good team. Most of the fans’ analysis says that Dayton Moore continues to fail as a GM and the team is looking at another heavily disappointing season this year. I think the doom and gloom is a little much but I understand where they are coming from. I do think, however, that they won’t be as bad as people project. Granted, a lot of my ideas are built on if-things-go-well scenarios but I think we could be looking at an 75-80 win season. Our rotation is improved, if only by people being healthy (although I have no counter to the point that our management can’t properly manage, especially when people are injured). And I know Zack is very unlikely to repeat his performance from last year, but I think he will be dominant again. Maybe not Cy Young dominant, but a true ace for sure. Meche will be better, and I have to believe one of the Hochevar, Davies, Tejeda group will work out as number 4. We’ll see what happens. On the offensive side, I think we’ll have our struggles, but as long as we can actually get on base and get hits before we put two outs on the board, we could see improvement. Defensive improvements would also help us survive with a less than stellar offense. Some of the acquisitions have been suspect, but if Guillen gets cut (pleaaaaaaase Dayton!) and Kendall has a decent OBP (he was the only one I have a real problem with and that’s mostly money related), I won’t hate the offseason. I know that justifying moves is a terrible thing and it only proves DM should be gone, but it’s better than if we traded Zack and Billy for Low-A pitchers right?
So here it goes….
Thoughts from around the house:
- Cooking was said to be a challenge, and I’ve found that to be both true and not. On the one hand, much of the Tanzanian food choices do take quite a bit of time and effort but planning can allow you very easy meals from time to time. I completely understand the choice to have someone do the cooking for you if you can afford it though. I’ve made it easier on myself by splurging on a few “extras” but if you ignore the start up time for a stick fire, cooking is similar in nature (speed-wise). But I do have a newfound appreciation for family cooks in the US. There is really no way to make a good balanced meal in anything shorter than 30 minutes.
- Fresh fruit is wildly underrated. Granted, it helps that I live in a place where the mango I buy probably fell off a tree down the street a few hours earlier (which means it needs to sit for 3-4 days to ripen but that’s beside my point). Regardless, a pineapple for breakfast (or lunch or dinner) is quite a pleasant experience :D
- Sugar goes on everything. My dinner tonight was kind of a potato stew in which I threw into the mashed potatoes every veggie that was on its way out in my cabinet. So I fried them in some sunflower oil and threw some sugar on. This is my latest experiment, and a success too! Mmmmm caramelized vegetables!
- Preparation is really necessary in food/drink. I can’t count how many nights I’ve wanted something more dynamic but thought about dinner too late, resulting in some variation of spaghetti with variations on top. Also, I have to boil my water, which obviously has to cool before I can drink it. I also run it through a filter, which takes quite a while. So I’ve come to the conclusion I need to start the water almost 24 hours before I want to drink it. That’s a lot of foresight for quenching thirst!
- For those of you who haven’t heard, I now possess (I didn’t pay anything for her so I guess I can’t own) a cat. She is named Chichi, which comes from the Swahili word parachichi which means avocado. That was the first thing I learned she liked to eat, which greatly eased her transition to my house. She’s quite the affectionate creature. Even now she’s curled up on my lap in between me and my computer. At night she finds her way under my mosquito net to sleep on my bed with me. She’s quite pleasant to have around and I’m enjoying her company!
- I never really thought about the value of lighting the space around your house until I came here. My back porch light didn’t work when I arrived and I actually avoided leaving the house, even just to the back stoop or water pipe after dark. Now I’ve had a new light installed, apparently an adapter inside had broken, and my back porch is well lit. It vastly improves my comfort and I’m quite grateful for it!
Thoughts from school:
- I do not understand how teachers can assign homework as frequently as they do in high school. I grade for one class and two subjects and I look at my paper pile in disgust. How did they do it for six periods every day or two?!?
- Homework is a different animal here. Many kids just don’t think they need to do it and so they won’t, not understanding its uses as a guide to the teacher. I can understand not knowing how to do something and not wanting to show that, but isn’t it still better to prove you know something, even if it’s just that you don’t know the material? That’s really valuable information, knowing you don’t understand something. I just don’t get it. But then again, I didn’t get it in the US when kids did that either.
- Tanzanians are obsessed with their exams. One thing I loved about the IB program was its focus on well rounded LEARNING. The tests matter, yes. Are they worth everything? You could make an argument they are because of how much bearing they have on the next level’s activities but IB, fortunately, never saw it that way. There’s more to being smart than knowing facts. People here still aren’t quite over the idea that if you can solve a difficult equation that means you know the material. There’s more too it than that!
Thoughts from the Region:
- If you’ll remember, my first post from TZ was finished by mentioning the earthquake that occurred during the construction of that post. I believe it ended up being around a 5.8 and was followed within 36 hours by a 6.0 nearby (<100 miles). I learned today, through the undeniable source Wikipedia :P, that there were apparently nearly 30 earthquakes detected relating to that quake leading a few people to wonder if volcanic activity could be playing a role. The nearest volcano to that series of quakes is none other than my district’s namesake Mount Rungwe. I’m not particularly nervous but having my own Dante’s Peak experience seems like it could be more excitement than I was planning on when entering the Peace Corps. I can feel the earth shake when I’m lying in bed sometimes but I have been able to tell that a fair majority of these are the large semi-trucks down the way on the main highway. We’ll keep you apprised of the situation, although I’m sure my adventurous is just taking any opportunity to extrapolate the most fantastic event possible.
Thoughts from the World:
The other benefit of my current situation is the ease with which I am connected to the world. I see the big events through the scope of The Wichita Eagle, which also keeps me informed about all the happenings in the ICT. Beyond that my blogs fill me in, so I’ll comment on what I’ve been up to date on.
- The $8 billion in high-speed rail funds were distributed with the biggest shares going to California, Florida, and Illinois. I’m a huge fan of both the California and Chicago-Hub proposals and I think they deserved the money they received without question. Florida’s proposal is more of a thrill ride to get to Disney and to make Orlando a secondary Tampa area airport. But it’s a start. Kansas even got 300K to do a study on restarting rail service through Wichita! At first I would have said give a large portion to a project that we can build as an example of how good high-speed rail can be in the US, but after looking at the numbers of how the money was distributed, I can only applaud the Obama administration. They really focused on not being the only government moeny being spent on a potential project. That's why even Kansas got help. It was a reward for doing your own work. A pact almost, saying if you do your end, we'll pick up ours, which is the way it should be. Now if only we could get closer to the federal/local funding split we see with highways....... :P While giving the largest sums of money to those who have the biggest and most promising projects, they also found ways to help the middle sized markets. For example, Wisconsin has poured quite a bit of it’s own money into developing a rail connection from Madison to Milwaukee and improving service onward to Chicago. The federal government used the funds to assist that project and really push it towards completion. Now Wisconsin is going to have 110mph service between its two most prominent cities in less than 5 years. That’s nearing Acela type service, which hits speeds over 130 but can hardly maintain them in the Northeast Corridor. Now, I’m in the camp that we should go all the way with HSR and build our systems for 220mph operation, but if we can go from no trains to several trains a day at 110mph in some locations with reasonable investments, I think that is fantastic! Let’s hope the jobs bill has more infrastructure money for investments like these!
- The Kansas City Royals are not projected to be a particularly good team. Most of the fans’ analysis says that Dayton Moore continues to fail as a GM and the team is looking at another heavily disappointing season this year. I think the doom and gloom is a little much but I understand where they are coming from. I do think, however, that they won’t be as bad as people project. Granted, a lot of my ideas are built on if-things-go-well scenarios but I think we could be looking at an 75-80 win season. Our rotation is improved, if only by people being healthy (although I have no counter to the point that our management can’t properly manage, especially when people are injured). And I know Zack is very unlikely to repeat his performance from last year, but I think he will be dominant again. Maybe not Cy Young dominant, but a true ace for sure. Meche will be better, and I have to believe one of the Hochevar, Davies, Tejeda group will work out as number 4. We’ll see what happens. On the offensive side, I think we’ll have our struggles, but as long as we can actually get on base and get hits before we put two outs on the board, we could see improvement. Defensive improvements would also help us survive with a less than stellar offense. Some of the acquisitions have been suspect, but if Guillen gets cut (pleaaaaaaase Dayton!) and Kendall has a decent OBP (he was the only one I have a real problem with and that’s mostly money related), I won’t hate the offseason. I know that justifying moves is a terrible thing and it only proves DM should be gone, but it’s better than if we traded Zack and Billy for Low-A pitchers right?
Friday, January 29, 2010
Continuing to adjust...
So I’ve just finished my first lab. It brought up an interesting issue: the fact that words are not the only impediment to understanding. Cultures have many differences but one I had never considered when crossing languages is the different connotations of the very same words. I gave instructions to take each measurement they recorded three times by saying just that, take each measurement three times. I thought I was very clear. The entire class proceeded to take one measurement with one weight, a second measurement with a different weight, and the third measurement with yet another weight. Each group I stopped at, I had to explain what I really meant was take the measurement with one weight three times and it often took me a good minute to have them truly understand. They had a lot of trouble understanding why we’d want to take the same measurement three times but I think we eventually got the point across. It’s just another example of the differences I’m seeing in the languages. I’ve also been noticing lately the way Tanzanians speak English is pretty much the same. Word orders that seem strange to me are repeated between Tanzanian English speakers. I’m thinking this would be a good reference to learn how I should order my words in Swahili, a sort of key translated to English. Hopefully I learn soon how to better explain myself, but I suppose this is the first step.
It’s the Monday of the week of January 11th and I find myself with no shortage of free time. I thought after this last week I’d be overcome by a fury of new engagements would struggle to keep up with. We’ll just leave it as that’s yet to be the case. I understand Peace Corps’ tentativeness with which they have new crops of volunteers ease into their assignments but I think building a lifestyle of lethargy is really only perpetuates that pattern. Today I taught from 7:30-8:50, same as always, the difference was, that I went into class with no lesson plan. I’ve been happy to find that my students increasingly ask questions and so I decided to give them a review day, which they fully took advantage of! I’m choosing to look at this as a positive that they’re engaged in class and not as the obvious negative: that I can’t teach them. I figure if they really thought they couldn’t learn from me they wouldn’t ask questions so I’m happy to take them. So, simple successes aside I’m home by 9am which leaves me about 14 hours to prepare for tomorrow. Perhaps I’m lacking long-term vision here and in a couple of weeks I’ll be cursing my time spent on Halo books and transit systems, but I do not foresee significant changes to my schedule. I have double the teaching to do come March but that will simply take a few extra hours and I’ll still have 8+ left. We’ll see.
No one ever glorifies the volunteer. Save perhaps the military volunteer. When you think about movies, there aren’t movies or tv shows about a teacher in a foreign land. When people are gone, it’s always about the return home. Never about what they did. It’s easy to picture your perfect world, how every day you’ll want to be exactly where you are and the people you’re working with are receptive and learn everything they need to from you. Hollywood kind of does a disservice by making everyone believe that there are people out there where everything they do is truly for the benefit of others. I think there was only one man for whom that was truly the case and I would argue he was more than a man. Most of those people serving others are actually in it somewhat to serve themselves. To satisfy that desire to do good in the world and that’s fine. They are helping, just not completely selflessly. I don’t think it’s human to think of others 100% and not think of yourself at all. But when your selfish humanism isn’t satisfied with the selfless acts you’re doing, conflict reigns. The dreams start shifting to other glories, the return home to care for those there or the next project you could take hold of with better authority from your learned experiences here. But the problem is every time is the first time, yes you can improve but not all improvements on your previous problems are solutions for your current ones. I find that I’m a dreamer, continually looking to the future and what fantastic things it holds, but I’m finding my focus on the present suffers. I can fill notebooks and files with ideas for something that will never be done but I can’t wait to finish my work for tomorrow so I can think about what happens a year from now. I need to change that, or at least control it. Focus on the now, and trust that the tomorrow will be there. I’ve spent my whole life preparing. Moving from elementary school where I prepared for middle school, which prepared me for high school, which prepared me for college, which prepared me for……certainly not this. I didn’t realize quite the change I made when I chose the Peace Corps. I’m in a holding pattern for two years, at least relative to my “preparation”. I suppose this is preparing me for life experience and blah blah blah but that’s not why I say I’m here. I’m here to take my preparation and apply it. Something I’m really inexperienced at, I’m realizing. My mindset is wrong. I’m thinking what I have to do to achieve the goal and move on to the next level. What does it take to be prepared to go back to the US? A plane ticket. That’s it, and I can get that at a moment’s notice. The return is not the end game, it’s the end of the game, and it’s not even a game. There’s not really a way to win or lose. I’m here to help, and interact, and teach. I suppose I can “win” if my students all pass and move on, but there’s more to it than that. I always think I’ll know answers eventually, like once I do enough preparing, I’ll be ready to be wise. But with the dissolution of my future last year and little resolution on the horizon, I’m starting to wonder where I’m going and if I’ll know it when I get there. Or maybe I’m here? Eventually I’ll recognize where I’m going when it is in hindsight, I just want to know it as now-sight too!
When I first decided this is what I wanted to do, I had a way of describing the opportunity that has stuck quite well throughout my service so far. The Peace Corps, is by far the most terrifyingly exciting thing I have ever done. It comes in waves, and I’m for sure on a crest right now. We arrived and were herded around a tiny conference complex in Dar learning simple greetings thinking maybe we could survive. Then we moved to Morogoro, where we sat in our family’s living rooms staring blankly at them when they tried to converse in even simple language, and thought maybe not. But slowly over time we were able to get by and by the end of training were quite comfortable in our routine. Then we leave our comfort zone again, moving to a place where we make the meals and clean the floors in addition to completing our daily activities, and think well, I can fry an egg, so maybe I’ll stay alive. Then after a month of getting a routine at home and realizing I can do everything I have to and even still have time to kill, we’re feeling pretty good about ourselves. I got there. I was functioning in a third world country with a basic vocabulary to interact with my fellow Tanzanians. I can cook, clean, teach, read, relax, and pretty much do anything else now. But then, just like before, a new challenge is here. I can function here, now I have to excel. Excelling is more than frying eggs, and washing clothes by hand, and teaching to a class that can learn from your English. Today, I added adult education classes to my list of things to do. These are people who for one reason or another did not finish their studies and are trying to after years outside of school. They are not great English speakers, and in fact, they are probably inferior to regular students at their level of studies. I’m going to have to go beyond just being able to explain ideas well. I’m going to have to explain ideas well in a language I’m learning as I use it. This is terrifying. This is exciting. This is why I’m here. These are the most motivated students I will encounter in Tanzanians schools. Many students try to leave school because it’s just easier, and they know they’re going to end up in the same job after they fail their exams anyway. So, in a society that does not see education in the same light as America, these are rare opportunities. Now I just have to make the most of it. I can be a good teacher for these students if I take the time to learn the language and relay the ideas well. I hope in two years, I can say I did.
And just a side note, I can do 3 consecutive pull ups :D I haven’t been able to do a pull up in about 5 years!
It’s the Monday of the week of January 11th and I find myself with no shortage of free time. I thought after this last week I’d be overcome by a fury of new engagements would struggle to keep up with. We’ll just leave it as that’s yet to be the case. I understand Peace Corps’ tentativeness with which they have new crops of volunteers ease into their assignments but I think building a lifestyle of lethargy is really only perpetuates that pattern. Today I taught from 7:30-8:50, same as always, the difference was, that I went into class with no lesson plan. I’ve been happy to find that my students increasingly ask questions and so I decided to give them a review day, which they fully took advantage of! I’m choosing to look at this as a positive that they’re engaged in class and not as the obvious negative: that I can’t teach them. I figure if they really thought they couldn’t learn from me they wouldn’t ask questions so I’m happy to take them. So, simple successes aside I’m home by 9am which leaves me about 14 hours to prepare for tomorrow. Perhaps I’m lacking long-term vision here and in a couple of weeks I’ll be cursing my time spent on Halo books and transit systems, but I do not foresee significant changes to my schedule. I have double the teaching to do come March but that will simply take a few extra hours and I’ll still have 8+ left. We’ll see.
No one ever glorifies the volunteer. Save perhaps the military volunteer. When you think about movies, there aren’t movies or tv shows about a teacher in a foreign land. When people are gone, it’s always about the return home. Never about what they did. It’s easy to picture your perfect world, how every day you’ll want to be exactly where you are and the people you’re working with are receptive and learn everything they need to from you. Hollywood kind of does a disservice by making everyone believe that there are people out there where everything they do is truly for the benefit of others. I think there was only one man for whom that was truly the case and I would argue he was more than a man. Most of those people serving others are actually in it somewhat to serve themselves. To satisfy that desire to do good in the world and that’s fine. They are helping, just not completely selflessly. I don’t think it’s human to think of others 100% and not think of yourself at all. But when your selfish humanism isn’t satisfied with the selfless acts you’re doing, conflict reigns. The dreams start shifting to other glories, the return home to care for those there or the next project you could take hold of with better authority from your learned experiences here. But the problem is every time is the first time, yes you can improve but not all improvements on your previous problems are solutions for your current ones. I find that I’m a dreamer, continually looking to the future and what fantastic things it holds, but I’m finding my focus on the present suffers. I can fill notebooks and files with ideas for something that will never be done but I can’t wait to finish my work for tomorrow so I can think about what happens a year from now. I need to change that, or at least control it. Focus on the now, and trust that the tomorrow will be there. I’ve spent my whole life preparing. Moving from elementary school where I prepared for middle school, which prepared me for high school, which prepared me for college, which prepared me for……certainly not this. I didn’t realize quite the change I made when I chose the Peace Corps. I’m in a holding pattern for two years, at least relative to my “preparation”. I suppose this is preparing me for life experience and blah blah blah but that’s not why I say I’m here. I’m here to take my preparation and apply it. Something I’m really inexperienced at, I’m realizing. My mindset is wrong. I’m thinking what I have to do to achieve the goal and move on to the next level. What does it take to be prepared to go back to the US? A plane ticket. That’s it, and I can get that at a moment’s notice. The return is not the end game, it’s the end of the game, and it’s not even a game. There’s not really a way to win or lose. I’m here to help, and interact, and teach. I suppose I can “win” if my students all pass and move on, but there’s more to it than that. I always think I’ll know answers eventually, like once I do enough preparing, I’ll be ready to be wise. But with the dissolution of my future last year and little resolution on the horizon, I’m starting to wonder where I’m going and if I’ll know it when I get there. Or maybe I’m here? Eventually I’ll recognize where I’m going when it is in hindsight, I just want to know it as now-sight too!
When I first decided this is what I wanted to do, I had a way of describing the opportunity that has stuck quite well throughout my service so far. The Peace Corps, is by far the most terrifyingly exciting thing I have ever done. It comes in waves, and I’m for sure on a crest right now. We arrived and were herded around a tiny conference complex in Dar learning simple greetings thinking maybe we could survive. Then we moved to Morogoro, where we sat in our family’s living rooms staring blankly at them when they tried to converse in even simple language, and thought maybe not. But slowly over time we were able to get by and by the end of training were quite comfortable in our routine. Then we leave our comfort zone again, moving to a place where we make the meals and clean the floors in addition to completing our daily activities, and think well, I can fry an egg, so maybe I’ll stay alive. Then after a month of getting a routine at home and realizing I can do everything I have to and even still have time to kill, we’re feeling pretty good about ourselves. I got there. I was functioning in a third world country with a basic vocabulary to interact with my fellow Tanzanians. I can cook, clean, teach, read, relax, and pretty much do anything else now. But then, just like before, a new challenge is here. I can function here, now I have to excel. Excelling is more than frying eggs, and washing clothes by hand, and teaching to a class that can learn from your English. Today, I added adult education classes to my list of things to do. These are people who for one reason or another did not finish their studies and are trying to after years outside of school. They are not great English speakers, and in fact, they are probably inferior to regular students at their level of studies. I’m going to have to go beyond just being able to explain ideas well. I’m going to have to explain ideas well in a language I’m learning as I use it. This is terrifying. This is exciting. This is why I’m here. These are the most motivated students I will encounter in Tanzanians schools. Many students try to leave school because it’s just easier, and they know they’re going to end up in the same job after they fail their exams anyway. So, in a society that does not see education in the same light as America, these are rare opportunities. Now I just have to make the most of it. I can be a good teacher for these students if I take the time to learn the language and relay the ideas well. I hope in two years, I can say I did.
And just a side note, I can do 3 consecutive pull ups :D I haven’t been able to do a pull up in about 5 years!
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Here is Picture Post Number 1! Mostly just photos but I'll narrate a little. The above photo is from Mikumi National Park. We went as a group during training and saw many of the characteristic Africa savanna animals.
So here are the two lions we saw. Apparently seeing them was rather unusual. But rarer still was what happened afterward. They.....enjoyed each other's company :P
Fellow volunteers observing the hippos. OK I admit it wasn't candid, but they did look like this before I asked them to repeat it!
My host family's house in Morogoro. It was quite nice considering. I was extremely fortunate!
The group at the end of training! I can name names later maybe....
When some of us weren't taking our oral exams we were learning a new sustainable gardening method. It has very exciting applications!
The farewell dinner with my host family and CBT mates!
This was my best picture of our swearing in. Sorry! I'll see if I can get better ones.
Next few pictures are from Christmas in Mbeya with another PCV Kate and the NGO she works with. She and Deb were wonderful to host us for the weekend!
We climbed the mountain behind their house and these pictures are from the walk to and climb up the mountain.
Theo couldn't climb his rocks so he settled for a tree.
The following are pictures of the valley that I live in. I took them when staying with another PCV Katie for New Years.
Hope you enjoyed them! I hope to do this again soon!
Friday, January 1, 2010
Something to say.....
First of all I wanted to wish everyone happy holidays! So far, mine have been quite enjoyable and relaxing, perhaps too much. But now, as I’m in between Christmas and New Years I wanted to write a few thoughts down. First of all, I have been continually blown away with the beauty of this region. If you’re considering a trip to Africa at all, I would highly recommend this region of the continent as it is absolutely gorgeous. All through training, my experience had been places that looked old and tired, as if the very first humans saw the exact same landscape when they walked this area. But here, in the southern highlands, the landscape is so much more alive…….and green. This is easily due to the rains that fall frequently here but it’s still quite a masterpiece. Forests on the mountains blend into giant tea farms with these hardy bushes that are harvested in a way so that it looks like a perfect sea of green. There will be smaller hills that are completely devoid of trees but are a solid green from the rows of tea bushes on them. If there are trees, they are quite often banana trees and they often dominate the valleys. It’s hard to really describe and I hope to put up pictures eventually! The other day I spent a lot of time standing at an overlook that I can’t help but think needs a blue sign on the road nearby telling traffic they should stop and look in a ¼ mile, even though they’re driving 80 in the left lane. Check that, we’re in TZ where 4-lane roads don’t exist, but I think you get my point. I’m quite happy with the physical location of my site, I just wish I had easier access to the view!
A note, I don’t usually write when I’m connected to the internet which makes it easy to not post right away, so whenever there is a break and the topic changes abruptly, assume we’re hours if not days apart in time. Thanks! :D
So I had a strange thought. I’ve been in Tanzania for two different years. While I know that’s simple manipulation of dates to make it sound long I realized that I have been here undeniably for over a quarter of a year, which makes it seem much much longer. It helps that that 3 months is split up over three very different locations of various lengths, but it’s interesting to think about. In my head I have our time spent in Dar Es Salaam as a very long time, or at least a much more significant portion of training than it actually was. It only seems long because every step was a new experience and I was trapped in a gated compound with no knowledge of the outside community so seeing the same small space made time drag. Training, which is over half of that time, was long enough to develop a routine. And now site for over a month feels like a fairly significant amount of time too, and routines are starting to develop. There is a degree of comfort that I’m finding but I realize at night how easily my comfort is lost; how it’s only skin deep. I don’t know this community like I know home. There, I know what’s around every corner and I know where people are. Here, the set up of cities and towns is not always logical and that makes things unpredictable, which can be unsettling. I remember the first night here I was terrified because I couldn’t see beyond my front porch and I had no idea where anyone was. It also didn’t help that PC had just spent the week before telling me how the whole world was out to get me etc. It’s better now but a city without streetlights is still a terrifyingly dark place. It’s almost like you can feel the people around you but you can’t see them. You know they’re there but what they’re doing, who they are, is all a mystery. One your mind is all too happy to muse upon. I never thought about it but comfort and security are all part of the American dream. The whole point of having your two story house on a cul-de-sac of houses just like it with slightly altered floor plans and a different color scheme is that it’s a controlled, seemingly safe environment. A yard is just space for the kids to play and a house is just wood and brick you live inside, but put it all together with a piece of paper that says you owe $150,000 for it and you’ve got a kingdom that is almost entirely under your control. Here, I live in a space that’s not mine and constantly question whether what I’m doing is “right” in the eyes of the public. As our country director loves to say, we’re on duty 24/7, which is completely true. And it’s tiresome, but it’s part of what we signed up for, and we’ll survive.
I am beginning to understand the value of simple purpose in life. I have spent the aforementioned three months in this country and so far have enacted my purpose for being here for less than a total of 80 min times 8 classes plus another 160 minutes. So 1760 minutes. Considering I have been here for 60 min times 24 times approximately 100 days, or 144000 minutes, my realization of purpose has been unbearably small. Ok, with even the absurd assumption that I’m sleeping 12 hours a day I’ve been here 72000 minutes. Yes, the argument can be made my being here is satisfying the goals of the Peace Corps mission but eventually cooking, cleaning, and sleeping while using enough Swahili to get by is grossly unsatisfying. Which brings me to my purpose for being here, teaching science and math. I will start on Monday, and probably within days regret my boredom and wishes for activity, but when the highlight of my day is making potato chips in a frying pan, I’m having trouble justifying my day. There’s a simple solution, prepare to teach. Yes! I have gone through that logic, and have somehow found every chore I could possibly think of to do before hand. I know I’ve always been an exceptional procrastinator but this is a little absurd. While my culinary experience is improving and I’ve been able to wash clothes by hand, including remove blood from a white shirt which I was proud of, I stand on the top of that hill feeling no sense of accomplishment. I suppose it is appropriate to learn that in any environment the human reactions are the same, do work when you have to and otherwise play. There’s really no point to this other than my being frustrated with my procrastination following me overseas, but it’s an interesting observation that I am who I am, and part of me is a procrastinator. It doesn’t matter if I cook on charcoal, kerosene, electric hotplates, or a gas/electric stove. I’ll look at the sky the same way whether I’m leaving class after a good day of work or getting out of the house because I can’t stand it anymore. Part of my justification for coming here was to improve on parts of myself I didn’t like, and my mastery of the art of procrastination was one of them. So I’ve struggled so far. I can try again tomorrow :)
A note, I don’t usually write when I’m connected to the internet which makes it easy to not post right away, so whenever there is a break and the topic changes abruptly, assume we’re hours if not days apart in time. Thanks! :D
So I had a strange thought. I’ve been in Tanzania for two different years. While I know that’s simple manipulation of dates to make it sound long I realized that I have been here undeniably for over a quarter of a year, which makes it seem much much longer. It helps that that 3 months is split up over three very different locations of various lengths, but it’s interesting to think about. In my head I have our time spent in Dar Es Salaam as a very long time, or at least a much more significant portion of training than it actually was. It only seems long because every step was a new experience and I was trapped in a gated compound with no knowledge of the outside community so seeing the same small space made time drag. Training, which is over half of that time, was long enough to develop a routine. And now site for over a month feels like a fairly significant amount of time too, and routines are starting to develop. There is a degree of comfort that I’m finding but I realize at night how easily my comfort is lost; how it’s only skin deep. I don’t know this community like I know home. There, I know what’s around every corner and I know where people are. Here, the set up of cities and towns is not always logical and that makes things unpredictable, which can be unsettling. I remember the first night here I was terrified because I couldn’t see beyond my front porch and I had no idea where anyone was. It also didn’t help that PC had just spent the week before telling me how the whole world was out to get me etc. It’s better now but a city without streetlights is still a terrifyingly dark place. It’s almost like you can feel the people around you but you can’t see them. You know they’re there but what they’re doing, who they are, is all a mystery. One your mind is all too happy to muse upon. I never thought about it but comfort and security are all part of the American dream. The whole point of having your two story house on a cul-de-sac of houses just like it with slightly altered floor plans and a different color scheme is that it’s a controlled, seemingly safe environment. A yard is just space for the kids to play and a house is just wood and brick you live inside, but put it all together with a piece of paper that says you owe $150,000 for it and you’ve got a kingdom that is almost entirely under your control. Here, I live in a space that’s not mine and constantly question whether what I’m doing is “right” in the eyes of the public. As our country director loves to say, we’re on duty 24/7, which is completely true. And it’s tiresome, but it’s part of what we signed up for, and we’ll survive.
I am beginning to understand the value of simple purpose in life. I have spent the aforementioned three months in this country and so far have enacted my purpose for being here for less than a total of 80 min times 8 classes plus another 160 minutes. So 1760 minutes. Considering I have been here for 60 min times 24 times approximately 100 days, or 144000 minutes, my realization of purpose has been unbearably small. Ok, with even the absurd assumption that I’m sleeping 12 hours a day I’ve been here 72000 minutes. Yes, the argument can be made my being here is satisfying the goals of the Peace Corps mission but eventually cooking, cleaning, and sleeping while using enough Swahili to get by is grossly unsatisfying. Which brings me to my purpose for being here, teaching science and math. I will start on Monday, and probably within days regret my boredom and wishes for activity, but when the highlight of my day is making potato chips in a frying pan, I’m having trouble justifying my day. There’s a simple solution, prepare to teach. Yes! I have gone through that logic, and have somehow found every chore I could possibly think of to do before hand. I know I’ve always been an exceptional procrastinator but this is a little absurd. While my culinary experience is improving and I’ve been able to wash clothes by hand, including remove blood from a white shirt which I was proud of, I stand on the top of that hill feeling no sense of accomplishment. I suppose it is appropriate to learn that in any environment the human reactions are the same, do work when you have to and otherwise play. There’s really no point to this other than my being frustrated with my procrastination following me overseas, but it’s an interesting observation that I am who I am, and part of me is a procrastinator. It doesn’t matter if I cook on charcoal, kerosene, electric hotplates, or a gas/electric stove. I’ll look at the sky the same way whether I’m leaving class after a good day of work or getting out of the house because I can’t stand it anymore. Part of my justification for coming here was to improve on parts of myself I didn’t like, and my mastery of the art of procrastination was one of them. So I’ve struggled so far. I can try again tomorrow :)
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